best laid plans....

This quarter was going to be great. I was going to be on top of all of my reading, (in fact, I was going to be ahead of myself), I was going to be organised and keep it together, while meaning to do lots of extra-curricular activities too. It was going to be so very together and, well, tight.

But somewhere between getting all of those coloured folders, making the wall planner, sorting out my desk, refining the filing method on my Mac and sharpening pencils, term started and classes crept up on me from nowhere. I've looked up and suddenly I'm a week behind on all that reading that I promised myself I was going to do. In fact, I'm already at that point where I am left wondering what to do - if I try to catch up with this week's reading, I will be behind with next week and end up looking even more stupid in section than I did today....

So what else have I spent my time doing?

Well, mostly moping to be honest. And developing certain stalkerish tendencies too, which is a bad place to be in. Even in this state, I can tell that. I'm waiting for him to call, to email, for him to wake me up from this bad dream and tell me it was all a joke.... And it all just seems to point in one direction. Did he ever really feel a shade of what I felt? How can you tell if someone feels the same way about you? Was it just a big joke? Can someone walk out of your life having made such a big footprint and then suggest that he only ever tiptoed across your heart?